Monday, May 21, 2007

I have a distant look in my eyes. Something that keeps people in but keeps them all out at the same time. I saw him approaching, keen to speak and on the edge of his seat. But I maintained my look, so much so that he started to withdraw. And finally had to be contented with not asking and just sitting.

I can't explain when did that look creeps into my soul. But I may be able to tell you how long it will stay. There are often many days where I wish it will continue because then I don't have to be accountable to anyone. Because they wouldn't ask. They don't dare to. And I would be safe.

So I can get lost in my own world thinking about the scar. The scar that serves as an invisible reminder to my wrong. I could never forgive myself for that. My words, they do not speak for themselves. My heart seems to be pulsating for any other reasons other than my own. I wonder if it is for you.

Elliot Perlman is scarily captivating. In an odd, non-comformist way.

Anyway, good food and great company seem to be on a roll since last week. Sunday saw me eating at a chinese restaurant with my family. Almost everyone turned up. The food was not my kind(except the shark fin) but it was definitely fun seeing all the aunties, uncles and cousins.

It was followed by monday's dinner with Shiyun. We dined at NYDC after much deliberation and whining from both sides. NYDC's desserts never fail to impress and we found ourselves very full at the end. Shiyun is officially the only person I know that eats whipped cream besides me. *clap clap* And she is an avid Grey's fan just like me. This is why we are friends even though she bullies me like crazy. Haha.

Alright so now I will rant about TV. I didn't managed to catch much this weekend. But I did catch Grey's Season 3 finale and I must say I am bewildered.

*Spoiler Alert*

I hate it when Derek gives a moving speech with that misty eyes of his. Did I tell you I have a soft spot for misty eyes? It is not alluring like Wentworth Miller. It's misty. And dreamy. And I always, always, fall for it. Damn.

When he looks at Meredith with that misty eyes of his, every word he said seemed to be from the bottom of his heart. It is as if he was a small puppy, pleading with her to commit. Okay, even if he did redeemed himself in this episode, I still think maybe they should just break up, since they are way too messed up already. Hahah.

But my heart goes out to George and Bailey, Christina and Burke. I knew when George took the test, he would fail it. Yet I did not forsee Callie being the Chief Resident rather than Bailey. That took me by surprise. I guess season 4 has a lot of explaining to do.

I am angry at Burke for calling off the wedding. Of all people, I did not expect him to be the one to back off at the last minute. If he knows that she is in it, why did he leave her? I thought the Christina-Burke's wedding story plot has been developed quite nicely along the way. But I think the ending kind of spoil everything.

One thing I disliked was when Meredith keep pushing Christina to get married because she needs to know that it is possible to get a 'happily ever after' ending. It is as if she was in denial about her failing relationship and she needed something happy to stop thinking about it. Christina is right to tell her that 'It is not about you now. It is about me.'

I always thought throughout the 3 Seasons of Greys, Christina and Burke has the strongest relationship to boast. Look at Izzie-Danny, Izzie-Alex, Izzie-George, George-Callie, George-Meredith, Meredith-Derek, Meredith-Finn, Derek-Addison, Addison-Mark, Richard-Adele, and many many more. All these relationships were shaky and some last, some didn't and one died.

But for Christina and Burke, even through dark moments like Burke getting shot and massive fights like the hand tremors incident, Christina and Burke have always been sure. They had put their hearts in this and never once thought of giving up or cheating on one another. That's a marvelous feat actually, consider the amount of drama every character went through.

So in my heart I hope they survived this wedding crap too. If they don't, we can safely conclude that the Grey's writers are a bunch of sadists and they never ever want any of their characters to be truly happy. BOOHOO.

And oh, Alex is back being an arse after being the nice guy for a while. I can't believe he picked Addison up just to get over Ava. Lucky Addison, being one of my favorite character, is being able to stop him and knock some sense into the confused boy.

I hope september comes soon, when a brand-new Greys Season 4 awaits me. (:

Arthritis hurts. I wish it would go away like the rain.